Some given to me as advice, some learnt from experience, but all useful when applied with common sense.
- Smile and nod.
- It will all seem better in the morning.
- Ignore it and it will go away.
- Never go to the toilet straight before going to the doctor.
- Be honest.
- Don’t drink wine when you’re thirsty.
- Don’t buy an espresso from a place that can’t spell it.
- There is no such thing as “the real world”.
- There’s nothing wrong with being different.
- There are better things to be than pretty.
- There are better things to be than clever.
- Generally speaking, beware of men with beards.
- It is never necessary to sin in order to do good.
- Nobody can dance.
- You can’t dance in slippers.
- Cultivate friendship.
- Fresh air and sunshine are good for you.
- In almost all cases, whisky named after a place = good, whisky named after a person = bad.
K C Murdarasi 
Whilst I agree wholeheartedly about the dancing/slippers thing, what’s with the beardist comment? (sad, hurt face)
Don’t worry, John, you’re one of the exceptions! I’ve had some bad experiences with beards.